Distance Learning – Please Be Kind.

Hi friends! I hope quarantine and social distancing is treating you well (as well as it possibly can.) I’ve had a lot of time to sit back and think about certain topics during this period that I may not have spent much time thinking about before. I’m sure we’re all in the same boat. I wanted to share my thoughts about what it’s like being a teacher during this time. I am now ending my 3rd official week of teaching distantly and there have been some things that have worked well but a few things that have also bothered me, especially when it comes to working with parents in a new way.

I have been fortunate enough to have an amazing class this year. If you’ve been following along my 3rd year journey, you know how incredible my students are. I’ve also been blessed with amazing parents. I’ve had my fair share of interesting parents during my first 2 years teaching so this year, I have been incredibly grateful to work with supportive and cooperative ones instead.

During this period of distance learning I have been shown so much support from this group of parents. I’m constantly getting thank you emails from appreciative parents and words of encouragement on platforms like Facebook. I’ve also been amused in seeing parents around the country thanking teachers all over for what we do everyday. Teaching isn’t an easy job and it’s been so humbling to see others share their gratitude towards us during this difficult time. It’s funny though how so many positive and kind comments can be extinguished by one negative comment from someone who has a strong opinion over choices you make as an educator.

Like I’ve stated, today wraps up week 3 of distance learning here in Minnesota. I have had an incredible turn out when it comes to my students completing all of their work and showing up for class Google Meets meetings. One problem I have had is that some of my students are choosing not to log on to their IXL accounts for math. Most of our weekly math assignments are done on IXL because:

  1. Our school has spent a lot of money on subscriptions to the program.
  2. The assignments are directed exactly to the topic/lesson we want students to learn about that day/week.
  3. I can go onto my teacher account and see who has completed what assignments and what scores they have received on them. I also can see how long a student has spent on the site per day and per week.

It’s an incredible teaching tool that I utilize every day in my normal classroom. Some of my students however, have either forgotten to log on or have chosen not to do the assignments because they don’t think I have access to see what they have done.

Like I would at school, I have reminded my students DAILY about these assignments and have told them how I do have access to see what has been done and I know for a fact a handful of students haven’t logged on to the site in over 30 days. I have warned my students multiple times in the past 2 weeks that if they do not complete these activities/assignments I would be calling them out to check to see why this was not being done. All of my students have internet access and all of them have iPads that they usually use at school but are now with them at home. They also know how to access IXL because, like I said, I used this EVERY DAY in my regular class. In my opinion, there really isn’t an excuse as to why some of my students have not logged on in over a month. Also, the students who have not logged on are students who I know are more than capable of doing the work on their own. My students are 4th graders (almost 5th graders) at this point in their school career, they should be independent enough to do work without having someone else constantly tell them what to do.

Yesterday, during our morning meeting, I pulled up my IXL teacher screen to show my class how I can see who has and hasn’t done the work. I asked a few of my students why they haven’t been on the site in over 30 days. We talked about how this is their job and they need to be mature enough to take responsibility in getting their work done. I also told them that if they haven’t been on for technical difficulty reasons, to let me know and I’ll be okay with that, I just need to know.

Well apparently that wasn’t the right thing to do during our meeting because a few hours later I got one of those emails that make all of the nice and kind ones nonexistent.

I had a parent reach out to me telling me how inappropriate it was for me to humiliate my students like that. She began sharing statistics with me about the crisis we’re in and how I shouldn’t be shaming kids for not having things done. She also proceeded to inform me about how this leads to mental illness and how I don’t know anything about mental illness in children. It was pretty much an 8 paragraph rant about how I have scarred my students for life and how I have no idea about what my class is going through….

Needless to say, after reading this, I wanted to throw up. I immediately forwarded the message to my principal asking for advice on how to respond. Once I did that, I went and cried under a blanket on my couch for an hour until I fell asleep.

I know there are so many theories and philosophies on best teaching practices and how to motivate children but those are all just theories and philosophies. Unless you have been a teacher and have spent 8 hours a day with the same group of kids for almost 8 months, you have no idea what actually goes on. I have known my class since September (some, I’ve known for almost 2 years now because I taught this group back when they were in 3rd grade.) I know my students. I know who works well and who needs constant reminders from me. I know who has supportive families and who may not. I know that my highest kid may also lack the most motivation so I need to push him more than others to get his best work out of him. I know them better than almost anyone else. Any teacher can understand that. I don’t think it’s right to have an outsider criticize a teacher without being in their shoes and knowing what the teacher knows about their kids. Granted, if it’s a concern about their own child, it is extremely valid. But if the criticism doesn’t even involve their child, there is no reason for them to get involved without the facts. That was the case with this parent. The concern wasn’t even about their own student, it was about my class as a whole.

I take things way too personally sometimes but to have someone tell you you’re failing at the one thing you thought you succeeded at, is heartbreaking.

I also caution some of you to not tell someone they know nothing about mental illness. I think that was the part of the message that hurt me the most. Just because I don’t come out and tell someone I’m struggling with a mental illness, doesn’t mean I don’t know anything about the topic.

I grew up with a schizophrenic father and a depressed anorexic sister. I have struggled with anxiety my entire life and have also been on antidepressants for my own depression for almost 5 years now. For this parent to tell me I’ve scarred my students and have been a trigger to metal illness, is an insult to me. Mental illness is a HUGE part of my life and I am not afraid to talk about it. I know that, right now in our country, we need to take care of ourselves but we also need to try to keep things normal. If I let my students get away with doing absolutely nothing during this time, I’m hurting them more than when I encourage them to complete their work. By telling me I was hurting my own students, she attacked my self esteem and put me in a downward spiral hurting my mental health. Never try to tell someone they know nothing about this topic when you don’t know what the person your talking to is dealing with.

As teachers, parents, students, people, etc. we’re all trying to do our best right now. We’re all doing things completely new to all of us. Instead of shaming each other for our mistakes and thinking we know better than them, why don’t we help each other and support each other. Like I said, I have gotten an incredible amount of encouraging and kind messages through this time. The problem is though, it only takes one negative message to make the others meaningless. Don’t be the sender of those kinds of messages. Think about how you would feel if something like that was sent to you when all you’re trying to do is help.

Hang in there everyone. I know we’re all tired and frustrated over this mess but we will get through it. We just have to take a nice deep calming breath and go one day at a time. That has become my new personal mantra.

 

For more day to day action, go follow my teacher Instagram page @lifeoftherookieteacher!

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Self-Care Box

Happy Mon-yayy! I was watching the Today Show this morning and they talked about trying to catch on Mon-yayy since we all get down on those Monday blues. I thought it was a great idea (plus I’m a huge promoter of Fri-yayys so this was just as fun!)

I’ve shared about my mental health a few times now and I posted yesterday about how I’ve been struggling more than ever this summer. Not going to lie, yesterday I was desperate for something new to help me feel better so I turned to my favorite source in the world, Pinterest!! Honestly, I just love Pinterest.

I searched “how to fight depression” looking for any tricks and tips I didn’t already know. (I feel like I’ve tried EVERYTHING!!) One AMAZING post shared the idea of making a self-care box and I fell in love.

Obviously because we all know teachers are suckers for a good home made project.

I found the idea on a blog post you can find here. On this site they talk about filling your box with items to meet many self-care needs such as physical, sensory, social, spiritual, and emotional.

**Fun side note: If you love wandering around Target for a few hours looking for run secret trinkets, this project is for you!! (and who doesn’t love Target!?) I also included links to most of the things I included in case you’re interested.**

I started by finding a fun gift box and wrapping paper to add my own touch to the outside. I got a fun adult coloring book for one of the categories so of course I had to color a picture to put on the cover of the box! “Today I choose joy.” The perfect mantra to see before opening my box of happiness. On the inside cover of the box I taped a picture of me when I visited Platform 9 and 3/4 at Kingscross Station in London. I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan so it was just another little touch to boost my mood when I open the box.

Okay so now that you see the outside here is my version of each self-care category. Some categories I included many things while others I only included a few…

Physical: 

For my physical self-care I bought different types of facial masks along with a pedicure mask. The blog post shared including yoga videos and bath bombs as well. (I just watch Youtube yoga videos and I’m not the biggest fan of bath bombs.) Basically, anything that can help and heal the body is good physical self-care!

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Sensory: 

This was another category that I didn’t include many items. I’m a very mental person so sensory items don’t do much for me. That being said, I do love a few certain things (mostly that deal with scent.) I got a small flower scented candle to smell when I need to relax. For me, I don’t even need to light a candle for it to work magic in relaxing me. I got some floral scented lotion to help me feel clean and smell good. Finally, I included a little fidget toy. I know these have become big for kids but I do love holding one when I’m feeling anxious. I have a tendency to move my fingers when I’m on edge so I feel more calm when I’m holding one of these.

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Social: 

I tend to get sad as well when I feel alone. To help with this I followed the post by including a list of numbers of people I can call when I need someone to talk to. I also included a pack of thank you cards to thank those in my life who have been there for me. I included those cards to help remind me that I’m not alone and that I do have people who have been there for me before. Finally, I put in a couple of pictures of my closest friends. This is to help me see that I have people I care about and there are people out there who care about me.

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Spiritual: 

I’m not the biggest religious person. I have my beliefs but I’m not overly spiritual. I do believe that you have to believe in something bigger than yourself in order to be content with life. The blog post shared different ideas to help be more spiritual and mindful. I first bought a positive affirmation coloring book with some new fresh colored pencils. Coloring brings me peace and is a form of meditation. I also purchased a gratitude/self-reflection journal. Inside the journal there are some positive quotes along with reflection prompts. I LOVE quotes. A good quote can make my mood shift in a second.

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Emotional: 

This was my biggest category of included items. For this category I wanted to find anything and everything that make me happy. The post recommended including some tissues and affirmation cards. I found a pack of mini tissues with positive sayings on them, so I thought they were perfect. I think it’s important to include the tissues because it says it’s okay to cry. By including these it is a reminder to tell myself letting out my emotions is a good thing. I then found a pack of affirmation cards in the “fun gift” section at Target. I LOVE this small section. If you know what I’m referring to you know it includes so many funny and unique gifts. I then found a pack of different cards and notes I have received in the past from many different people. These are for me to look at and read when I need a little pick me up. I then included a fun little cat poetry book I got as a gag gift for my birthday from my mom. I have a cat and I always love a good pun. Lastly, I included a picture I took of the Eiffel Tower. I LOVE Paris and the Eiffel Tower has always been something that I have been obsessed with. When I was in Paris, I was the happiest I had ever been. This picture is to spark that happiness!

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I think that this is the best project for anyone and everyone to make! Whether you struggle with mental heath or not, it’s always good to practice self-care. Having a box full of things that are directed completely towards that, is perfect for any person. I plan to put this box in my closet until a day that I know I need a pick me up. When another hard day comes, I now have something to help me feel better. The post I got this idea from talked about even having a daily box that you can use/look at for even 5 minutes at a time everyday. I LOVE this idea and I can’t wait to see the difference it’s going to make on my rougher days.