Tag: Summer

Hello August

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Happy August everyone! Holy Hannah, how is that even possible? Now is the time of year when school starts to creep back into the mind and DIY classroom projects begin. I’ve slowly begun with a few fun projects I’ll be sharing with you soon but today I’m going to tell you all about the final trip of the summer before all of the work starts.

This past Tuesday my mom, myself, and a couple family friends hopped in a car and drove 12 hours to the Middle of Nowhere (literally.) We drove from central Minnesota to Glasgow, Montana. The part I love about this cute little town is it’s referred to as the Middle of Nowhere, you even can buy shirts with that saying and the town on it.

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My mom and I went with her best friend and her best friend’s daughter who are close family friends. My mom’s best friend’s son lives out there and has recently gotten engaged, so we hopped int the car to go and celebrate with them.

When we reached Glasgow Tuesday night we walked around to take in the small town and then ate dinner at a 50’s knock off Dairy Queen diner called Flip. It was an adorable small town restaurant with only 3 people on staff at a time. We had the classic burger with fries and a shake. Amazing!

Wednesday we met up with the son and fiance and went golfing in the desert like grounds of Montana. It was beautiful but HOT. It was a nice 100 degrees that day. I had never been golfing ever so it was quite the experience but super fun. The scenery was incredible. We were surrounded by rolling hills and mountains with little to no civilization. We then all went to another small family owned restaurant and had fresh deli sandwiches for dinner.

That night we also went to get some groceries and I found the BEST homemade soap ever! I had to take a picture because they were so great!
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On Thursday we took a 20 minute drive out to Fort Peck, Montana. We walked over a bridge that has a dam right underneath. At the time, they had 2 “doors” open from the Fort Peck lake to the opening of the Missouri River. It was crazy watching the flow of the water rush through the gates and into the river. The bridge was pretty but SUPER high off the ground. There’s something about bridges and height that don’t mix well for me. The 4 of us were having fun trying to make a joke out of our actual fear.

We also went hiking around the area to take in more scenery that leads into the Fort Peck Reservation. A few years ago I traveled down to volunteer in the Dominican Republic and there was something about that scenery and this one that looked almost identical.

We then drove back to Glasgow and went to all of the local shops. I love a good family owned home store. Looking for little trinkets are my favorite. I found the best magnet that really seemed to resonate with me!

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Coming home we luckily got to chunk it into a 2 day trip instead of all in one night. (I seriously hate car rides.) We got back into the state yesterday and then had to rush right to a wedding of an old friend of mine who also happens to be a daughter of another one of my mom’s close friends.

It was a fun filled mother daughter week. My mom and I never get alone time together so it was awesome to get to experience so many new and fun things with her. I know I’ve said this before but my mom is my best friend and role model in life. She’s the reason I became a teacher and a coach, I wanted to be just like her. It was one of the best weeks of my life and for sure the best week of the summer.

Happy August again friends. For some of us that means we’re a month out from the start of school, for others you might be starting this week, and for some you might be in the middle of your years right now. No matter what August means to you, enjoy it and live it up. I know I’m going to make the most of my last 30 days of freedom!

 

With the school year around the corner, I’ll be back updating my instagram account more frequently with back to school projects, hacks, and classroom decor. Go follow me @lifeoftherookieteacher to be apart of my back to school journey.

My Top 8 Self-Love Books

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Over the past year I’ve been working hard on helping myself through many different outlets. One thing that I’ve spent a lot of time doing is reading different “self-help” books to learn different tips and perspectives. (Yes, there is a lot of controversy over self-help books, and I know they are not a cure to anything, but I have found little treasures in each book that I have used as mantras for my better life.

I’m going to share my top 8 that have helped me and that have been quite entertaining. Yes, most of these you’ve probably seen or heard of before. I know you’ve probably read 1 if not more of these books but I just thought I’d share with links to Amazon or Target where you can easily find and purchase them .

My Top 8:

  1. Freedom from Toxic Relationships by Avril Carruthers

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One day last summer I had an interesting therapy session where we talked about toxic relationships. I realized that I’ve surrounded my self in toxic relationships everywhere in my life and had been doing that for years. This book explains any and all relationships that exist in your life. It helps acknowledge if you are in a toxic relationship and then gives the steps on how to move forward. It helped me quit a coaching job that had me working with toxic people, something that I wanted to do for awhile but never had the guts to do.

2. Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend

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Because I’m prone to being in toxic relationships, I tend to have a problem with setting boundaries. I don’t like saying no. This book is for the “I can’t say no” person. It has some good tips and reminders on how to say no and how that will make you a happier person in the end. It isn’t an entirely religious book but different bible verses are immersed throughout if you like those little reminders.

3. Brave, Not Perfect by Reshma Saujani

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This book is written by the founder and CEO of the program “Girls Who Code.” Being a teacher, I’ve totally heard of her program but never knew how it was founded. This book is split into 3 parts talking about why girls are so hard on themselves, why being brave is important, and how to not worry about perfection and start being brave. I’ve been a perfectionist FOREVER so this book really spoke to me!

4. YOU are a BADASS by Jen Sincero

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To be honest, I’m only half way done with this one but, so far, I’m a fan. This one is split into 5 parts on different ways to love yourself no matter what. The main focus of this book is to remember how awesome you are. It’s the best reminder for everyone!

5. Grace not Perfection by Emily Ley

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This is another book split into different parts. The fun part about this one is that it’s interactive. Emily Ley designs clean cut planners and life journals and this book is set in that format. After each chapter there is a different journal or writing prompt that relates back to the chapter topic she talked about. (By the way, for all of you who love clean cut art and designs you’ll LOVE just looking at this book just as much as I do.)

6. Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis

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Yes this is probably the one you know/have heard of/have read. I love this book. Rachel is so real it’s ridiculous. I love how open and honest she is about EVERYTHING. I think that’s what makes her books so popular. She’s being real about life talking about lies we believe about our lives and ourselves and how to get over them. (BTW she also has a legitimate chapter about sex…it doesn’t get more real than that!)

7. Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis

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Rachel’s second book is all about achieving your goals and believing you can do them. She uses her own life as an example about building her own company and the obstacles she fought through to get where she is today. The first part of the book lists all of the excuses we use to not do something and how to let them go. Part two is all about behaviors to adopt in order to live a healthier life to achieve your goals. The final part is all about the skills you will acquire while you are working towards your goal. Her final message is about “believing in your dang self!” I love Rachel Hollis. She is my new role model in life.

**Fun fact: Rachel has a podcast called Rise and one of her episodes features Reshma Saujani talking about her book Brave, Not Perfect. It’s amazing!**

8. Staying Strong 365 Days a Year by Demi Lovato 

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This is a daily devotional book that includes a different quote (these could be bible verses, famous quotes from classic literature, song lyrics, or a quote from Demi herself), a paragraph explaining the quote, and a daily objective to embrace for the day. I’ve gone through this book for the past 3 years now and I love the messages she gives. Demi has had a hard life and she is very honest about her experiences and makes herself easy to relate to. I usually read my daily devotion before bed and try to implement the daily objective for the next day. That way I end each day with a positive message and a goal for the next day. I highly recommend this one!

Self-Care Box

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Happy Mon-yayy! I was watching the Today Show this morning and they talked about trying to catch on Mon-yayy since we all get down on those Monday blues. I thought it was a great idea (plus I’m a huge promoter of Fri-yayys so this was just as fun!)

I’ve shared about my mental health a few times now and I posted yesterday about how I’ve been struggling more than ever this summer. Not going to lie, yesterday I was desperate for something new to help me feel better so I turned to my favorite source in the world, Pinterest!! Honestly, I just love Pinterest.

I searched “how to fight depression” looking for any tricks and tips I didn’t already know. (I feel like I’ve tried EVERYTHING!!) One AMAZING post shared the idea of making a self-care box and I fell in love.

Obviously because we all know teachers are suckers for a good home made project.

I found the idea on a blog post you can find here. On this site they talk about filling your box with items to meet many self-care needs such as physical, sensory, social, spiritual, and emotional.

**Fun side note: If you love wandering around Target for a few hours looking for run secret trinkets, this project is for you!! (and who doesn’t love Target!?) I also included links to most of the things I included in case you’re interested.**

I started by finding a fun gift box and wrapping paper to add my own touch to the outside. I got a fun adult coloring book for one of the categories so of course I had to color a picture to put on the cover of the box! “Today I choose joy.” The perfect mantra to see before opening my box of happiness. On the inside cover of the box I taped a picture of me when I visited Platform 9 and 3/4 at Kingscross Station in London. I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan so it was just another little touch to boost my mood when I open the box.

Okay so now that you see the outside here is my version of each self-care category. Some categories I included many things while others I only included a few…

Physical: 

For my physical self-care I bought different types of facial masks along with a pedicure mask. The blog post shared including yoga videos and bath bombs as well. (I just watch Youtube yoga videos and I’m not the biggest fan of bath bombs.) Basically, anything that can help and heal the body is good physical self-care!

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Sensory: 

This was another category that I didn’t include many items. I’m a very mental person so sensory items don’t do much for me. That being said, I do love a few certain things (mostly that deal with scent.) I got a small flower scented candle to smell when I need to relax. For me, I don’t even need to light a candle for it to work magic in relaxing me. I got some floral scented lotion to help me feel clean and smell good. Finally, I included a little fidget toy. I know these have become big for kids but I do love holding one when I’m feeling anxious. I have a tendency to move my fingers when I’m on edge so I feel more calm when I’m holding one of these.

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Social: 

I tend to get sad as well when I feel alone. To help with this I followed the post by including a list of numbers of people I can call when I need someone to talk to. I also included a pack of thank you cards to thank those in my life who have been there for me. I included those cards to help remind me that I’m not alone and that I do have people who have been there for me before. Finally, I put in a couple of pictures of my closest friends. This is to help me see that I have people I care about and there are people out there who care about me.

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Spiritual: 

I’m not the biggest religious person. I have my beliefs but I’m not overly spiritual. I do believe that you have to believe in something bigger than yourself in order to be content with life. The blog post shared different ideas to help be more spiritual and mindful. I first bought a positive affirmation coloring book with some new fresh colored pencils. Coloring brings me peace and is a form of meditation. I also purchased a gratitude/self-reflection journal. Inside the journal there are some positive quotes along with reflection prompts. I LOVE quotes. A good quote can make my mood shift in a second.

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Emotional: 

This was my biggest category of included items. For this category I wanted to find anything and everything that make me happy. The post recommended including some tissues and affirmation cards. I found a pack of mini tissues with positive sayings on them, so I thought they were perfect. I think it’s important to include the tissues because it says it’s okay to cry. By including these it is a reminder to tell myself letting out my emotions is a good thing. I then found a pack of affirmation cards in the “fun gift” section at Target. I LOVE this small section. If you know what I’m referring to you know it includes so many funny and unique gifts. I then found a pack of different cards and notes I have received in the past from many different people. These are for me to look at and read when I need a little pick me up. I then included a fun little cat poetry book I got as a gag gift for my birthday from my mom. I have a cat and I always love a good pun. Lastly, I included a picture I took of the Eiffel Tower. I LOVE Paris and the Eiffel Tower has always been something that I have been obsessed with. When I was in Paris, I was the happiest I had ever been. This picture is to spark that happiness!

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I think that this is the best project for anyone and everyone to make! Whether you struggle with mental heath or not, it’s always good to practice self-care. Having a box full of things that are directed completely towards that, is perfect for any person. I plan to put this box in my closet until a day that I know I need a pick me up. When another hard day comes, I now have something to help me feel better. The post I got this idea from talked about even having a daily box that you can use/look at for even 5 minutes at a time everyday. I LOVE this idea and I can’t wait to see the difference it’s going to make on my rougher days.

Fighting the Sad

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I love summer just as much as any teacher but there are days that I struggle getting through. I’ve shared before that I have dealt with depression and anxiety for a handful of years. I tend to have my bad days when the days are long and empty. Don’t get me wrong, I love not having anything to do but that’s the trigger my mind and body usually needs to spiral.

I’m not going to lie. Today is a hard day for me. Today the depression is winning. All I’ve wanted to do today is sleep and not talk to anyone because I didn’t see the point. It’s crazy how it just comes out of nowhere sometimes. Yesterday was a fun and busy day! I spent time with my family and got to spend the night at a music festival with my best friend. I was so happy yesterday but then today, it was all gone.

Usually when I have bad days it stems from being alone and thinking that I have no hope in having someone who I will get to spend the rest of my life with. I’ve had some pretty bad luck with friends and relationships in the past. I’ve never had a single person in my life who chooses me over others. When I spiral, my thoughts usually go to believing I’ll be alone forever.

I know it sounds crazy and I know it is completely irrational but when that sad parasite takes over, irrational thinking seems totally rational. I’ve been really trying to think of ways to make me feel better and to battle those sad thoughts and days. Some things that I have found that have helped me feel better are meditating and yoga. I also find that just sitting in the sun helps a lot. Things aren’t always that easy though. It’s a day by day learning experience that I’m trying to work through. I just hope these days are fewer and fewer as the summer goes on.

June in Review

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I know that it’s already July 6th but I figured since summer is already 1/3 of the way over I would go back and look at the first 1/3 because why not?

It’s crazy to think that 1 month ago was officially our last day of school. As fast as summer may be going it’s strange to think that it’s only been a month since the last day with my kiddos. Our last day was June 6th and I’m still sad thinking about those great kids! I miss them so much. This year was difficult at times but they were sweet and kind students and the chances of having such a great class like that is pretty slim.

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Even if this isn’t in chronological order, on June 5th something super exciting happened for my mom! She is an elementary school teacher in my hometown (the next town over from where I teach now.) June 5th was her last day of school. At the end of the day the whole district goes to an end of the year staff celebration. At this celebration my mom was awarded an “outstanding service” award for being such a great teacher at her school. Unfortunately my dad was in the hospital at this time so my mom wasn’t able to attend the ceremony. My sister and I got the privilege to accept the award for her. We took a nice little picture with her teammates to surprise her.

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A little fun fact about me (which most people don’t agree with) is that I am a HUGE Taylor Swift fan. On June 13th we found out the release date and name of her 7th album. The album will be called Lover and it will be released on August 23rd! I’m so excited. I know her music has different reviews but I love how her style always changes. I hate to admit this but I’m low key excited for the end of August because of this album (even if that means I’m back at school the following week.)

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June 15th I was able to meet one of my very best friends from high school for brunch. Her and I go way back. We met when I was 12 and she was 10 through gymnastics. For years we practiced and competed together. As we got older we coached together and did other high school sports together. When I left for college we stayed in touch and when she went off to college we tried to meet up every now and then to stay up to date on our lives. We went to a local Minnesota restaurant called the 3 Squares located in Maple Grove, MN (for anyone out there who might be in the area at some point.) It was a delicious spot and the perfect place for brunch and (the best part) bottomless mimosas!!

June 17th I did something totally out there. I went to the hair salon and died the under coat of my hair pink (a pink peekaboo.) I’m a very low key, keep to myself person so getting my hair colored hot pink was something nobody would have thought I would do. I love it! 2 days later I decided to get a little bit more crazy and went to get my nose pierced. Actually I went to get it re-pierced. A few years ago I had a small stud in my nose but I took it out for student teaching. I have always been told that piercings and tattoos are frowned upon in the education world. It wasn’t until my piercing had closed that I realized they were accepted in my school. I missed it so much but never went to get it redone. I figured, this was the perfect time.

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On June 19th my mom and I decided to take trip down to Minneapolis to see the Twins play the Red Sox. Sadly, they lost that game but my mom and I had the best night and shared some delicious margaritas.

Sunday, June 23rd was another amazing day. My little sister (Lea) will be entering her senior year of college with a degree in pastoral studies. This summer she is interning at the Methodist Church in our hometown. On June 23rd my baby sister got to deliver her first ever sermon in front of the congregation. It was incredible, I was so proud. In a week she will be leading the entire service. It’s crazy to think that she is only 20 years old and she is already making such a difference and doing what she loves.

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June 29th was another big day. Lea’s best friend from childhood had her baby shower for her first born due in September. This little girl was my second little sister. She would stay over at our house almost every night in the summer. We haven’t spoken in years so seeing her beautiful pregnant self again was wonderful.

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Finally, on June 30th I got to introduce my mom to one of my most favorite series in the world, the Avengers. For all you super nerds out there, you would know that Marvel studios rereleased Avengers: Endgame to share some post credit scenes that were not in the first release. My mom has never watched any Marvel movie so when I jokingly asked if she would go with me and she said yes, I was shocked. I had to fill her in on as much as I could before and throughout the movie but it made me so happy when she looked at me when it was over and said how great it was and how she wants to go back and watch all 21 previous movies.

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June was fast but great. I can’t wait for the next 2 months of summer to see what fun and random things are in store for me!

 

 

Hello Fresh

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Happy almost July 4th! Over here in the great bold north we’re already starting our second month of summer (which is insane!) I’ll be honest and say that I’m kind of bored….I know, I know “it’s summer this is what we look forward to all year as teachers.” I’m not saying it isn’t great but I feel like I have nothing to do. It’s fine to have nothing to do a few days in a row, but all summer…..I’m going crazy.

I’ve been thinking about what to post since I have no school stories or activities going on so I thought I would share with you something that I love! I know the whole meal delivery service is becoming a huge hit but I’ll be the first one to say that I love it and it is something to look into! I HATE cooking. I’m bad at it and I don’t have the patience for it so needless to say, I eat out a lot. That all changed when I discovered my favorite kit/program, Hello Fresh.

I promise this is not an endorsement deal in any way (I’m not even close to qualified for something like that) I just truly love this. Like I said, I hate cooking. Growing up, my mom wasn’t the best cook in the world and all my dad knew was how to grill meat and fish (and he usually cooked them so much they dried out) so I was never around someone who really knew what they were doing. I moved out last year and I have wasted too much money on eating out and groceries from Target that end up in the trash because I don’t know what to do with them. One day I was on Facebook and an ad for Hello Fresh came up offering a discount on your first set of meals ordered. I was intrigued.

I looked at the site and thought, “hey why not?” The week I looked at it they were offering a discount on meals (which I found out they offer all the time) and found that I could order 3 meals (2 servings each) for only $40. Now for those of you who don’t live alone, 3 meals actually covers 6 meals since I’m eating alone. I usually spend much more than that anyways each week eating out and buying groceries so I figured the price was worth it.

I LOVED IT! When the kit arrives the meals are split into paper bags labeled with each meal, meat insulated with non-toxic dried ice, and cards that give the recipe for each meal. Before the Friday of the next week, you select the meals you want ordered off of the weekly menu the site offers. The kit arrives on Wednesdays with your meals. Usually the meals are pretty easy to make. Seriously, if I can do it anyone can! The best part is it’s all natural ingredients. I’m not a huge person on “eating organic” but I do love when I know exactly what something is made out of, and it usually tastes better!

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This week I ordered a pasta meal, a fish meal, and taco meal. Today I made my new taco meal! The official name of the meal is Pork Carnitas Tacos and it is amazing!

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I’m a huge taco/burrito person so this was right up my alley! This was also a super easy meal! The longest part for me, was slicing up the onions, peppers, and tomatoes needed. I honestly just love how they provide you with EVERYTHING you need and the recipes are super easy to follow. Unlike most “word filled” recipes, these recipes have written directions along with picture directions, which when you are as incompetent in cooking as I am, it’s the perfect thing!

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Now I know that my picture does not look even close to the same as the website’s picture (when does it ever) but it tasted even better than I expected! I seriously recommend this meal delivery service. It has made me an even better cook (to a point) and has gotten me to eat much healthier than I ever have before!

If you are interested in giving this service a try, I can help you do that for free! (Remember, this is not an endorsement in any way!) As a member I can send out free week invites to interested individuals AND extra discounts to friends. Currently, I still have a free week of meals that I can give out. I also have a $40 off coupon for anyone who also may be interested. If you have always wanted to try a meal delivery service, this is your chance to do it for free. If this interests you, leave a comment saying you are interested! I can have the first person who offers try the service for free and the second person who is interested get the $40 off coupon.

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I promise this is an amazing service and definitely worth the try!

Crazy Cat Lady – It’s Official

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If I haven’t stated before I love animals! If I could have endless dogs and cats my life would be content. Growing up, I had 2 different black labs (both at different times) and a couple cats every now and then but my dad was not a cat person so we didn’t have them for very long.

When I was 21 our second lab was put down and my dad didn’t want to train another dog. At the time, I was currently living in an apartment and was utterly depressed that my puppy wasn’t around anymore. We weren’t allowed to have dogs in our apartment so I had the sudden urge to adopt a cat. I adopted my baby Lucy when she was 6 years old at our local humane society. Since then, she has been my best friend. She is the calmest and sweetest cat alive. She also has major anxiety over meeting strangers so her and I got along too well. I moved home for 2 years and brought Lucy home with me. My dad fell in love with her and finally became a cat person.

One year ago I moved out of my house again and moved into another apartment. Lucy and I lived alone together again. As the summer turned into the school year I started to feel bad because I’d be gone for 8-12 hours at a time and she’d be left alone. When we lived at home, my dad was always there (being retired) so she was never lonely. I started to see her become more and more needy when I would come home from work. She also had my morning routine down to a science and would cry when I would walk out the door. I started to think about getting her a companion to keep her company.

The two of us got through the year with the thought of a second kitty in the back of my mind. I did some research and found that, with a cat as timid and calm as Lucy, a kitten would be better to adopt and bring home than an adult cat. On a complete impulse (I’m a very impulsive person when it comes to something I want) I went back to the humane society just “to look.” They had so many litters of kittens and were looking to get rid of them, so of course, it was too perfect for me. I fell in love with a little kitten who was the runt of her litter and the calmest of them all. I figured she would be the perfect match for my Lucy.

Today I got to pick up my new baby, Zoe, and bring her home. I have been nervous to see how Lucy would react because she hides when ANY adult besides me is in the apartment so I didn’t know how she would take a new animal. I introduced them by having Zoe in her carrying case and Lucy walk up to see her behind the bars of the door. Lucy was so scared when she saw the case that she was walking soooooo slowly to see what was inside. As soon as she saw Zoe she hissed (which I’ve never heard her do before) and ran away to hide. I did some research about introducing cats with new kittens and from that, I set up a room for Zoe in the bathroom. Everything that I’ve read said to let the kitten explore without the other cat around. It also said to have her spend a lot of time in “her room” to give the old cat some time to think things are normal while getting used to the new cat’s scent. As soon as I put Zoe in the bathroom, Lucy got the nerve to come out. I gave it some time before I pulled Zoe out again. I tried to reintroduce them but Lucy hissed again and ran to hide.

I’m trying to figure out how to keep these two both content while also introducing them to become best friends. I don’t want Lucy to become depressed and angry, she’s been through a lot. Before I adopted her, she had been in some tough house holds and it gave her some serious PTSD and anxiety. I know she needs a friend so I’m hoping this works. If ANYONE has any tips or tricks on how to get them to bond and for Lucy to become less anxious, PLEASE let me know. I am now an official crazy cat mom and want to have 2 happy little kitties.

 

This is me.

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I’ve officially been on summer break for 5 days now and I’m finally getting caught up on my sleep! That has been the one thing I have been looking forward to the most that is for sure!! I figured since I haven’t had anything school related going on, I should write a little about myself to fully and finally share with all of you who I am. Whether it’s 100 people who read this or 0, I thought it would be good to share with you my story.

My name is Lisa, I’m 24 years old, and I am from Minnesota, born and raised. (I know I have made many references and posts about that before but just in case it wasn’t that obvious…) I grew up the next town over from where I am currently teaching. I had the opportunity to attend elementary school at the same place my mom worked at. At the time, she was a 3rd grade teacher as well. When I was in 3rd grade, I got to have my mom as my math and spelling teacher. I loved it! As I’ve said before, my mom is the main reason I wanted to become a teacher. Growing up she was also my track and field coach and my cross country coach. She was, and still is, my idol. Because of spending so much time together, we became super close.

With my mom, I grew up with my dad and my sister Lea all in the same house. We were a close small family of 4. I had the best childhood growing up. Family was always number 1 for my parents so we spent a lot of time together. My dad was an activities coordinator at the local jail for the next county over. Growing up all I knew was that he worked in a jail, it took years for me to actually understand what he did. When I was 13 he had an accident that shook our whole world. From the accident we discovered that he had a disease called Myasthenia Gravis (MG) which shuts down his immune system and deteriorates his muscles. Because of his diagnosis, he was put on disability leave from his job. This summer will be 11 years he has been out of work and “retired.” That was hard for us to handle but in the long run it made us stronger.

My little sister Lea is 20 years old. She has had her own struggles as well. I’ve posted about this before in my National Eating Disorder Awareness post, but when she was 15 she was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa. She has struggled with this for almost 6 years now. As a family we had our own ups and downs understanding her struggle and adjusting to get her the help she needed. She is a HUGE part of my life, I love her more than anything else in the world. She is my best friend and in a weird way, I’ve always considered her to be my own child.

Between my dad and my sister, my life has been shaken up many times. I’ve had to understand that even in the most stable and loving households, terrible things can still happen. I’ve struggled understanding this, however. I have gone through my own rounds of depression. I struggled for most of my college years understanding my family while also trying to find myself. It was the hardest 4 years of my life.

I am not ashamed to admit that I have had issues with mental health and ideas of self harm. Through everything that has happened, I have also dealt with the loss of family members, friendships, and relationships. All of those had an impact on my struggle. When I was a junior in college the second boy who had ever shown an interest in me, ended things and I was not okay. I got very upset and tried to do things to myself that I wish I wouldn’t have tried. But I realized my struggle and sought the help I needed. After many MANY discussions with friends and family I went to the doctor. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and have been on antidepressants ever since.

I did okay for a few years and then my world became a mess and I went through the same cycle again. I had many highs around the time I turned 22. I graduated from college and gotten my dream job. I also found someone who I thought I had a big connection with and lost my virginity to him. It was a big deal. A few short weeks later though, I found out that boy didn’t feel the same way about me and I was not strong enough to handle that. I made the choice to be intimate with a person I adored and then I found out it wasn’t a mutual feeling. I struggled that summer with dealing with that event on top of getting ready for my first year of teaching. I was so thrown off by a boy that I couldn’t even enjoy my first few months of teaching ever. It got to the point that I threatened to end it all. I’m not proud of myself for those dark days and moments but they did happen and got me to the point I am at now. I did and said things I never should have said and almost lost the best friend I ever had by doing it. The boy was my best friend and I almost ruined that relationship by trying to manipulate him into wanting to be with me. It took many months but we worked through it and he helped me get the help I needed.

Besides that, my first year teaching was amazing but stressful (as all of you teachers know.) This also took a tole on my body. Summer 2018 came and I knew I needed to make a change in myself because I was tired of feeling so stressed, anxious, depressed, and tired all the time. This was when I discovered therapy. My doctor originally had advised going to talk to someone when I was first diagnosed but I was too afraid and ashamed. I finally took the step 3 years later and it has been a life saver.

I have been going to therapy for one whole year now to work on my anxiety and depressive tendencies. It has helped me accept who I am and has taught me how to cope when things get to be too much for me. It has also gotten me to start writing on here and to find joy in my life. I still struggle from time to time when things at home or at school are over the top but now I have ways to work through it.

I never wanted to share my personal life on here before because I don’t like talking about myself and I wanted to keep my page light but I thought it was about time for me to open up to anyone who decides to read what I write. I also wanted to share my story so anyone who has struggled with the same things can see that there is hope and ways to work through it. I would love to hear any other stories from those of you who have found peace and joy and who have advice for someone like me who still needs reminders every now and then. Struggling with mental health is not something to be ashamed of. It is something that needs to be shared and talked about to help others.

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So that’s me. I know this is not a normal post but I think it is fair to anyone who reads my blog to know the true me. Thank you for keeping up with me these past 6 months. I hope to continue to share about my life inside and outside of the classroom. I have some new blog ideas that I want to share this summer. They may or may not be school related but I think it’s time to add a bit more flavor to my topics.

SCHOOL’S OUT FOR SUMMER

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I am pumped! Today has been an emotional day for sure. I was so excited for this day to come but when I was sitting in my room with my kiddos the last 5 minutes of the day, I realized I didn’t want them to leave. It has been such a great and amazing year.

We started the day off by moving all of our tables into one giant table. I wanted us to be together as a group for our last day instead of separated by 5 different tables. They came in and it was very chaotic (just as expected.) I had a mini word search for them to work on as something to do but most of them didn’t find that to be as exciting as laughing and talking with the rest of their friends, which is understandable. By the time they settled down we came to make a circle at the front of the classroom for our last morning meeting together.

During the meeting we did an activity that we did on the first day of school. The activity is one of my favorites that involves toilet paper (which they find to be hilarious!) I pass around rolls of toilet paper and they are told to take 1-3 pieces. (Some versions of this activity say to have them take as many as they want without telling them what it’s for but I found with 3rd graders, that was too much to handle.) On the first day of school they had to then tell myself and the class that many things about themselves, today they had to share that many memories/favorite things about 3rd grade. It was super sweet. Most of them took it pretty seriously and had some really good answers. We had some funny moments that came back up as well. It was nice for me to get a flashback of the year to remember what all happened.

I then had them go back to their spots and take out something to write with. I gave them each a blank piece of printer paper and told them to write their name in the middle and circle it. We then spent the next 15 minutes passing each sheet around the table so each student could write something nice on everyone’s piece of paper. It could be something they liked about that person, a nice memory, or a kind word. Again, most of them took this seriously and loved it. (Yes a few tried to be “funny” or “too cool” for the activity but the nice thing was that the rest of the class didn’t feed into any of that.)

Once we finished I read the great book Last Day Blues by Julia Danneberg and then we went to play outside. They went straight to specials and I took out their end of the year gifts to put at their spots. I found a pack of 24 “80’s style” sunglasses on amazon for $16.47 (prime) and  24 jump ropes for $39.75 (prime) and put together a little message to go with it. Props to Pinterest’s help on this one. I wrote each of them their own personalized card and put in the message “you shined so bright this year, now it’s time to jump into summer” into each one. (Hence the sunglasses and the jump ropes….not original, I know but easy!) Because they are sweet 8 and 9 year olds, they LOVED it!

To end the day I had put together a slideshow/video of our year together. I love taking pictures of everything we do throughout the year because I love looking back at the memories and how much they’ve grown. I also love putting it together into one movie to share with all of the families. We watched our slideshow and then took some final end of the year class pictures.

I am going to miss my class so much! We’ve had our struggles, oh yes, but they were all sweet and kindhearted and that is something I will truly miss. They have been such an incredible group of kids who cared so much about everyone else. My one goal when the year starts is to make them all love to be at school and today I got to see that I accomplished that. One of my boys who has never been afraid to tell me he hates school told me today he was very sad that school was over and that he would really miss me. He followed that up with a hug and I almost started to cry. It was everything I had worked so hard for. It’s those moments that make it all worth it.

That being said, I am very happy it is summer! I am EXHAUSTED and ready to sleep, read, swim, eat, and do whatever else I want to do when I want to do it. Tonight I plan on binging on pizza and having a nice cold one as my reward for making it through! Happy summer to my fellow teachers who are on their breaks and to all of my friends still in school, keep plugging through, you are AMAZING!!

As for me, peace out to year 2! I am so excited for year 3!!